a walk and thoughts

It amazes me sometimes how I forget that the simplest things can be the most pleasing and enjoyable ones. There are days that I can’t seem to keep my girls happy no matter what toy we play with or what games we come up with. That’s usually when I know it’s time to get out of the house. The trouble is, we don’t always have the car. I have no problem with taking the girls outside, except that when we go outside it isn’t into a backyard or a forest or anything remotely close to it. It’s a busy street with cars, loud noises and stores. On this day we did got for a walk up and down our street but when we came back I decided to take the girls down the side of our building where there is a bit of greenery.

Lucy especially loves being outside and this is where my guilt comes in at not having a real place for her to play in the fresh air. There are only so many times that we can go up to my mum’s and use her backyard..what we really desire is our own home. A place where our kids can run around freely without fear of them running into the main road. This causes a bit of conflict within myself funnily enough, because I consider myself to be a city girl for the most part. We grew up in suburbia, really. Near to hospitals, coffee shops, schools and convenience.
Ben on the other hand, had a cow in his backyard and lived about 15 minutes away from town. He would happily buy us a home with at least an acre and live in the middle of nowhere. I’ve told him that unless it was within 5-10 minutes of espresso that I wasn’t interested. Call me crazy, but seeing as how I’m the one home all day with the girls surely we need things to do! I imagine that there is lots to do when you have your own driveway or backyard or woods on your property but it’s been so long since I was a kid that it intimidates me a little, this idea of getting out there and playing in the yard. I’m sure that this sounds silly to most and I’m OK with that.

My poor girl, totally thrilled to be outside and look around..but doesn’t really know what to do once she’s out there. This picture makes me want to laugh and cry. Laugh because she’s so cute and girly and sis afraid to touch anything and get dirty. Cry because a two year old shouldn’t care about any of that, and should be used to that sort of fun.
I know one day, when Ben’s residency finally comes through that we will have a home to call our own. One where I can freely make the mistake of painting every room in the house a colour of the rainbow because I finally can. One where we can mark the girls height on a door frame as they grow, and one where we can plant a little garden with vegetables and flowers and make mudpies and have a swing set. This is a dream I hold onto, because I can’t let go of it..I need it to keep me going through this time of renting apartments and being cooped up with babes who so deserve a little garden with fairies all their own.

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2 thoughts on “a walk and thoughts

  1. Katie, I relate to your fear of "what to do when we're actually out here?" Whenever I take Noah outside, I find myself instantly weeding, you know, because if I can keep him occupied, I should do something 'house-wifey'. Just like if we're indoors — if he's playing by himself, then I'll tackle the dinner prep or whatever.Today Noah seemed so bored when we were outside and I couldn't figure out why. That was, until I actually dropped what I was doing (non-essential, purely aesthetic weeding) and chased him around. We had an awesome time.I also would like to point out that it's less than 10 minutes from here to a delicious fair trade coffee shop and bakery which is ALSO next to the library and across from a lovely walking trail. 🙂 The country life is calling your name…! (Okay, maybe that's just me…)

  2. You know, I think you may have convinced me.. maybe we'll buy the lot next to you guys!!! 🙂 Even though I am completely intimidated by the thought of living 'out in the country' i'm pretty sure I would love it once I got used to it. 10 minutes to espresso is reasonable 🙂

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