We had very blessed weekend, giving thanks with and for the ones we love. We were fortunate enough to have two Thanksgiving meals, one with my mum, her boyfriend, two of his sons and my brother. The other was with three of our parish priests. You might be thinking, “you have three parish priests??” We actually have four! One had other plans. The reason there are so many is because they have three parishes under their care to serve.
We enjoyed naps, lots of time in the kitchen, a nice long walk in the woods, the Seaport Farmers’ Market, and lots of delicious turkey and pie. We were even able to squeeze in a date night, thanks to my mum’s generous babysitting offer.
I started yesterday out feeling like the very last thing I wanted to do was give thanks. Not because I don’t have anything to be grateful for, I am so richly blessed in my vocation and family life. I woke up feeling angry, frustrated and ungrateful. Angry because my dad isn’t here and I am still adjusting to my mum’s new relationship. Frustrated because I have lost so much weight that I don’t really have anything to wear that fits and ungrateful because as much as I have, it’s not all that I want. Then we went to mass, and I spent most of it feeling paranoid that the people around me where judging me for letting Ben and my mum keep the girls happy so I could more fully enter into the mass…all of this made for many many tears, lots of good listening on Ben’s part and a nice hot bath to soak away my heavy heart while I prayed.
God is so good, friends. I came out of that tub ready to start the day again. Ready to give thanks not because I felt like it, but because God deserves it. I gave thanks for Abigail who was in my belly this time last year, and this year joined us at the table to experience the glory that is stuffing. I gave thanks for all the time we did have with my dad, thanks that I will eventually be able to replace my wardrobe and thanks that God is the God of my past, present and future..and in His time, He will give us our hearts desires if we keep our eyes fixed on Him as a family.
Giving thanks is not always easy, and for anyone that found it difficult this year, you are in my prayers and you are not alone. Happy Thanksgiving to you and your loved ones! I am now going to go eat more pie and drink more wine!